(.' '.))))))))) <- caterpillar

people trying to insist a fandom is tiny when it /only/ has a few thousand works on ao3 meanwhile my current fandom is a sixteen book series and has several hundred fewer works than goncharov, a movie that, and i cannot stress this enough, doesn’t even exist

#measuring the size of fandoms based on their goncharov index#this has been a useless text post you may now resume your normal programming#rote has a goncharov index of 0.63#for perspective ofmd has an index of 26.5#spn’s is 360.8#the cosmere is 2.26 for a fantasy book comparison#i am very normal

The Goncharov Index, everyone.

siphonophores will never not freak me out. stop doing that its SCARY but also please don't ever stop doing that you ethereal marine cryptid

the red shape is a person of average height. the green line is one of these freaks. btw

Miguel’s beef w a 15 year old was wild lmao

Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.

Might I add:

The defeat of the wizard who made people choose how they’d be to be executed

The woman who raised the changeling alongside her biological child

The human who died of radiation poisoning after repairing the spaceship

The adventures of a space roomba

Cinderella finding Araura (and falling in love)

I don’t know a snappy description but the my nemesis cynthia story certainly lives in my head

hilariously, these are almost all in my fic tag. so, a compiled list from the notes (and some extras):

1. The God of Arepo (graphic novel 1 / 2 / 3) (ebook)
2. The Monster of Sentan
3. The Witch’s Cat
4. Raise Both Children
   
5. Stabby the Roomba (honorable mention)
   
6. Cinderella Marries the Prince (comic)
   
7. My Arch Nemesis Cynthia
8. Pirates and Mermaid
9. Eindred and the Witch
10. The Demon King
11. The Cornerwitch
12. Grandmother Beetroot
13. Apocalypse Daycare Worker
14. Grandmother Accidentally Summons a Demon
15. New Year Saga
    
16. A Story About Changelings
17. Ranger in the King’s Forest
18. The Difference Between a Hare and a Rabbit
19. Goblin Men (Canines)
    

I am in love with you /p

People don’t talk enough about how easy it is to sleep in the dirt.

Like at a certain point on a dig day you BECOME THE DIRT.

And then comfy lil cozy crevices where you just dug start ~calling your name~

This is my favorite corner of the internet:

BONUS:

Okay but consider:
-Very soft (no rocks at all, just buttery smooth, sifted, light, and fluffy soil
-Pesky rocks are on the other side of the dirt pile. Don’t even worry about them.
-Usually cool to the touch, even on a hot day
-You can just sink into it. Like a snow angel. But dirt. Bliss.

it's time for another round of: text and images Ive accumulated because they remind me of bill cipher

When u breathe in her spores and feel the psychotropic effects as her mycelium begins to grow into your brain 🥴🥴🥴🫠

i don’t think this is usually how sex works

Maybe not wher you come from but i live in the forest and I'm a perfectly normal ant who can be trusted not to spread spores into the colony before mmm climbing as high and high as high as high as i can to and then and then and then and then

The Watcher by The Phantom Painter

Found another idiotic accounting mistake from my predecessor that I have to fix and I was like "WILL THE SPECTER OF THAT MAN'S INCOMPETENCE EVER CEASE TO HAUNT ME" and my coworker was like "Why do you talk like that"

Who the fuck is Jon Sims

I know I put this on the tags of that "horses will eat meat and eggs" post but like if that's all it takes for people to get freaked out and think horses are deranged then they should also be aware that almost all other herbivores do the exact same thing. It's actually seems to be way less common for herbivores to eat 100% only plants than it is for them to eat meat occasionally (koalas are one of the suspected few strict herbivores bc their diet and digestive system is so specialized). They don't go out searching/hunting for it like carnivores and omnivores, but if they stumble across some carrion or some eggs (or some particularly easy live meat), that's fair game, even moreso if other food is scarce.

Like,,,,Deer will eat dead fish and rabbits, and have been recorded eating dead deer also. They've also been recorded eating live hatchlings from bird nests. Rabbits will scavenge birds a lot, and also do scavenging cannibalism. Snowshoe hares have been recorded scavenging a lynx, which is ironically their main predator when alive. Elephants will eat fish. Cows will eat live birds just right of the ground, along with eggs they may find.

Horses aren't deranged bc they'll eat meat, they're deranged bc theyre like if you put the ghost of a psychically-sensitive victorian child into the body of a 1500 pound mammal.

this is by far my favorite safety/warning sign btw. they really went off with this one

No cuz I fucking love this sign. It’s not an actual barrier so it’s not like some sort of challenge it simply says “fuck around and you will find out”

Ohohoho I LOVE “fuck around and find out” signs, especially the really dramatic and ominous (but true) ones

(Context for the last one: it’s a WWII era sign posted around the soldiers’ washroom mirror, warning them to never discuss military plans in places where civilians could hear them and report back to the enemy, e.g. in restaurants and pubs in the country. “Loose lips sink ships”.)

I also love these two, which I would place in the category of “You already fucked around, now you’re about to find out.”

Aerated water is fucking scary. It’s water that has a fuckton of gas in it, which reduces the buoyancy to the point where you will immediately start to sink if you fall in.

can we talk about the drowning machine sign, please, guys? i’m dying to talk about the drowning machine sign

WE CAN TALK ABOUT THE DROWNING MACHINE

it sure fucking is buddy

After watching mutant mayhem trailer i wanted to do are of donnies so what better than this audio